E is for Elliott

It's the day before he turns 10 and we are driving to school. I ask him what he wants for his birthday and, after looking out the window to ponder for a moment, he says calmly and in all seriousness, "I want to be able to say c-r-a-p and I want a Dr. Pepper." Trying my best not to laugh out loud (and wondering why I spent so much on an actual present), I tell him that I will have to think about it. The story ends at Gerties with Elliott drinking a Dr. Pepper and with him nervously spouting a well-rehearsed, "Holy cow, did I eat a crap load of pizza!" After being reassured that he wasn't in trouble, he smiled contently, completely satisfied by his rebel moment and the best birthday present ever!

This story remains one of the most endearing in my life with Elliott and, with a boy like him, endearing moments are in abundance. Even though at 15, c-r-a-p is as common as hello and I should be so lucky to have Dr. Pepper as my biggest beverage concern, the story still speaks volumes about the essence of my Elliott.

If you were to ask me what makes Elliott stand out from others, I would unequivocally say that it is his heart of gold. Since the day he was born, he has loved and cared and felt like no one else I have ever known. Growing up, the comment shared by every teacher Elliott had was that he was a friend to everyone. He has always been the first to scoop up the underdog, include the one alone on the playground, help those with challenges (physical or mental), and put his arm around anyone in need - all without a single concern for what this may do to his own status. Of course, the older he gets, the harder I imagine it is to be so outwardly accepting of others. But if it has been harder, he has shown even greater character by still never losing sight of the compassionate person that he has always been.

Other things I would say to describe Elliott:

The worst consequence for Elliott would be knowing he disappointed someone he cared about.

He wears his heart on his sleeve. He loves completely, hurts deeply, and cares abundantly.

He is a gentleman and the first to hold open a door...for anyone, carry groceries for a stranger, or defend the character of someone he thought was being disrespected.

He is a friend to anyone who needs one.

He says "please" and "thank you" and "I love you" whenever they apply and times when even I might forget that they do.

With each one of these attributes I list, I can think of a million examples to support them. As I think about each of those times, I am full of pride in the young man that I have raised...am raising. I am grateful to be along for the ride that he is taking and truly believe that anyone else in his path will feel as blessed as I have to have been touched by his sincerity.

Now I know my son is far from perfect, and I spend a decent amount of energy talking with him about the times that he isn't. But one of the things I know (and dislike) about the world is that people are quick to tell others when they do something wrong and often forget to tell them all that they do so right. One of my goals this year is to tell the people I love, that I love them...more. Elliott will read this (only because I will make him) and my hope is that when he does, he will realize all that is good and beautiful in him. I want him to know that his actionsspeak to his character and his heart will always define him. Amidst the mistakes he will make along they way, if he can keep those two things in check, he will, no doubt, be part of what makes the world a better place.